Beautifully Broken

I am more beautiful for having been broken

I know from scripture that there is beauty in a broken spirit, a contrite heart and being humbly and completely sorry for our sin. I know that this is acceptable praise to God. Jeremy Riddle sings, “I’m sweetly broken, wholly surrendered”. But honestly, nothing about the word “broken” sounds sweet, beautiful or acceptable.

Vicki Yohe sings, “Pain, the gift nobody longs for”. Did she just refer to pain as a gift? There’s a fruit of the spirit we totally skip over, “Long Suffering”. Who wants that? I don’t fast and pray and quote scripture, “God, bring me some pain and suffering. Oh, and while You’re at it, please make it last and last and last until my bed is soaked with tears and the pain in more than I can bear”.

From this side of the pain I can see His work. I get a better understanding of what it means to have beauty for ashes, for Him to turn what was meant for harm to be used for my good. When I reflect on the most painful times of my life I realize how my love for the Lord, and realization of His love for me, has developed. I see how I have become more compassionate and less judgmental. I see how I am beginning to learn what it truly means to love others.

If I allow a bad experience to leave me bitter I will have to go through that same type of pain again. The cycle is broken when the weapon isn’t prospering, but instead it’s making me surrender more completely to God, more beautiful for having been broken… sweetly broken.

~Kimberly

17 thoughts on “Beautifully Broken

  1. I really admire you and your love and trust in Kai’s decision. I am so sorry you have been thru so much hate and ignorant people. Hopefully, some day soon, minds will be open and transgenders will be accepted without question. Stay strong. You do have support.

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  2. i AM CONFUSED HOW CAN A CHILD BE TRANSGENDER. WAS kAI BORN A BOY AND YOU CHANGED HER ORGANS. I BELIEVE WHO YOU ARE IS WHO YOU ARE NO MATTER YOUR COLOR RELIGION BOY GIRL YOU FEEL THE WAY YOU FEEL AND I AM GLAD YOU ARE FIGHTING. BUT Kai IS SO YOUNG .BOYS DO NOT REALIZE THEY ARE GAY TILL 9 OR 10 KAI IS SO YOUNG.PLS EXPLAIN

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    1. People don’t know they are gay until puberty because being gay is about who you are attracted to physically. Being transgender is about who you are. In psychology we learn that children know their gender by age 3 or 4. Kai knew she was a girl.
      There are many articles about our story if you’d like more info you can google.
      There are ample research studies and medical evidence about what transgender is and the recommendations.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I agree with you 100% Kimberly. I knew I was a female since age 4. Society (and my parents) Told me I was male until I left home at 18. I still hid my gender identity until age 56. I am now transitioning into who I was all my life but was afraid to do anything about it. We know very early on who we identify. I’m not alone. I have dozens of friends that have similar life stories. You can not get people like the poster you’ve responded to here to understand any of this. You can try but they just don’t have any real life understanding about what they are saying. Thank you for knowing your child and making the changes needed to help her through this. Mothers like you are far and few between!

        My Best to you & Kai,
        Susan R🌷

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  3. Please don’t get discouraged you have a beautiful little girl. I am greatful u can accept this so many die or leave home because of their parents. It make me want to be a parent to all the kids in the lgbt community that their parents reject them! I believe god loves everyone. Keep up the good work you are doing not only for your child but for all children. Thanks from a mother of 3 .

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  4. Kimberly, my name is Sheila O’Dell, I live in Hillsboro, Oregon. I am a 65 year old retired, disabled woman. I just finished reading your “Amazing, Heartbreaking, Beautiful, Loving Story, about you and your beautiful daughter Kai. I just wanted the two of you to know, how much you’ve both touched my heart. Thankyou ever so much for Sharing your warm loving story. Many blessings to you and Kai.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Thank you for your beautiful touching story! I just became a mom 2 years ago to a amazing wonderful transgender son. I am so proud of him!!

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Kimberly,
    Reading your story, touched my heart. I have no idea what you’ve been through but being a mother myself, I know what that love is for your child. I too would do anything so they would be happy. You’re a brave and wonderful Mom. Kia is a very lucky child that god has blessed her with you for a Mom. Keep up the good work. Take one day at a time and blessings to both of you!

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    1. Deb, thank you for your prayers. Perhaps you could pray for yourself as well.
      My science degrees and my personal relationship with Christ make for wise decisions on my part. My daughter is growing up to be everything the Lord designed her to be.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. God loves you and Kai very much. Thank Him for giving you the tools mentally, spiritually and physically needed to help your daughter become who she is. I will also say a prayer for the poster above. Understanding of this journey is not easy for many who do not recognize the path.

        Liked by 1 person

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